Stay Classy: The Year Without a Santa Claus

Maybe you’ve never heard of it. Maybe you’ve always wanted to see it. Or maybe you’re just tired of the new. Whatever your reason, the classics are always worth a nod. In Stay Classy, we look some of the films that started it all and how they hold up today. So sit back while we reel through the past.

Year released: 1974

How it fared back then: It fared just as it was expected to. It was a stop-motion TV special from the Rankin/Bass production company that had already brought us the children's Christmas classics Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman and Santa Claus is Coming to Town, among a few others (plus more that would follow). It premiered and stuck. What more could they have asked for?

Why it's lasted: Thirty-seven years later, it's still on TV annually, though maybe less so than in the past. It seems like those who grew up with it continue to praise it but younger generations haven't heard of it. While Rudolph, Frosty and Santa Claus is Coming to Town show up every year on basic cable, The Year Without a Santa Claus needs a bit of tracking down. That being said, it's still got that classic quality: a heart-warming story about restoring Christmas cheer. And, claymation plus Santa Claus is a symbol of the season in itself.

Classic moment: Snow Miser's song and dance, followed by his step-bro Heat Miser's response song and dance. They make up only a fraction of the movie but their legacy has been ever-lasting, springing t-shirts, costumes and even a Batman & Robin reference from Mr. Freeze.

Does it still hold up? For the most part, yes. It's a cute and short story with some catchy songs (though I wouldn't mind a few being cut). I like it because it's got that retro Christmas feel that reminds me of the other Rankin/Bass classics I grew up with, but it's one of the ones that I hadn't seen.

Stay Classy: Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

Maybe you’ve never heard of it. Maybe you’ve always wanted to see it. Or maybe you’re just tired of the new. Whatever your reason, the classics are always worth a nod. In Stay Classy, we look some of the films that started it all and how they hold up today. So sit back while we reel through the past.

Year released: 1937

How it fared back then: It was the first feature film from Disney and it just exploded. Critics loved it, as did film-goers and industry bigwigs alike. With inflation taken into account, it's the 10th highest grossing film and the highest grossing animated film  at the box office of all time (inflation considered). And accounting for inflation, it also beats out Avatar. With such an overwhelmingly positive response, it put Disney on the track to what it would become today, leading to countless more film releases. It also set the precedent for the company's re-releases from the Vault.

Why it's lasted: Disney. Cynically speaking, we know what a powerhouse they are in the industry. That being said, they also make amazing movies with state-of-the-art animation and great music. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs is no exception (and yes, you did hear "Heigh-Ho" in a commercial recently). It's also made seven of AFI's 100 Years lists!

Classic moment: When Snow White is sweeping, dusting and washing away in the house, singing to herself as animals fill the scene. That scene in its entirety defines her character and is the imagery of her set off when her name is mentioned today.


Does it still hold up? The dwarfs are cute, the story is compelling and the 30s are artistically evident though appreciable, but I do have feminist issues with it (which are obvious). Then again, most of these issues could also be taken up with any classic fairytale. One thing that's strange about this film is that it's a children's story with an adult protagonist, however with childish characteristics. It's very uncommon today (if you ask me, adults are just over-thinking it), but I'm not sure what to make of it, only to point out its peculiarity. It's an admirable, history-making movie, but it's not what we'd watch today, which is likely the reasoning behind much-needed updates Snow White and the Huntsman and Mirror, Mirror. But of course, that's the grown-up in my speaking. Children might feel otherwise. (I sure did.)

Don't You Forget About: The Lion King

Sure, it's fun to catch the latest flick at the multiplex, or grab the newest release at a video store, but sometimes you just gotta say, "Out with the new, and in with the unknown." There are plenty of older flicks out there that are worth a rental, but never registered on your radar. In Don't You Forget About, we remember the long-gone gems, so you don't have to.

Photo: impawards.com

THE LION KING


BY: Guest Fille, Marissa Medford


WHAT it's about: It's Hamlet for kids. When lion cub Simba is born, he takes the spot for next-in-line to the throne from his jealous uncle Scar. As the king-in-training grows up, he becomes more and more excited about his future as ruler of Pride Rock. He even sings a song about it. However, Scar devises a sneaky scheme to kill Simba's father Mufasa and frame the cub for the murder. Simba falls for it and runs away, leaving Scar to become dictator and king of Pride Rock.

WHO'S in it: It features the voices of an all-star cast: Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Matthew Broderick, James Earl Jones, Jeremy Irons, Nathan Lane, Rowan Atkinson, Whoopi Goldberg, Cheech Marin, Jim Cummings.

WHEN it came out: 1994.

HOW come you haven't heard of (or just seen) it before: When the film first came out, it was a massive box office hit. Seventeen years later, you'd be lucky to find it at your local rental store. Plus, it's locked in the Disney vault. Although parents might remember it, this generation is missing out on the soon-to-be classic.

WHY you need to watch it - immediately!...

DVD: Gnomeo & Juliet

Photo: Amazon.ca

Starring James McAvoy, Emily Blunt, Michael Caine and Ozzy Osbourne. Directed by Kelly Asbury. 84 minutes. G

Why garden gnomes? Seriously. Why? Do children have affections for them like they do cuddly bunnies and silly monkeys? Do they even know what they are? Maybe it's just an attempt at dual address, using "quirky" gnomes to pull in parents. But even then, fondness for gnomes is kind of overrated, if you ask me. They're just ugly and dirty and creepy.

But I guess some people out there think the little guys are cute, because they're the stars of this Romeo and Juliet adaptation for children. The story is basically the same, except that the rival yard-dwellers are colour-coded: red vs. blue (no, not that red vs. blue, Halo fans). And everything is translated into lawn language, ie. vehicles are lawn mowers. There's also the element of Toy Story-esque magic: inanimate garden gnomes come to life and lead dramatic lives when people aren't around.

What persuaded me that this film might be alright was the Elton John soundtrack. But after seeing the film, I just feel scammed by advertising. I love Elton John's music and I expected a couple original songs, not his hits recycled and re-purposed, and barely even that. Honestly, if this is the only compelling aspect you see in this film (and it was for me), just re-listen to his greatest hits CDs.

As far as the plot is concerned, we all know how it goes, and this film throws no twists toward the older viewers. Furthermore, there's a complete lack of passion in the titular duo's romance. Yes, it's family film, but like I said, it's clearly an attempt at dual address, and there's just not enough in it for the parents.

Laughs are also scarce. I enjoy jokes aimed at kids. I like silly and predictable children's humour. And with the grown-up gags falling flat, you'd think at least the kiddie fun would hold up. But you'd be wrong. C-

EXTRAS: Deleted scenes, alternate opening and endings.

12 Days of Festive Faves: How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

Photo: amazon.ca

HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS! (1966)

THE GIST: Above the sweet little town of Whoville full of Whos lives the Grinch at the top of Mt. Crumpit, a crooked cliff of a residence. On Christmas Even, the wicked, green grump decides he's going to try to stop Christmas, because he's hated it for nearly forever. So, he decides to disguise himself as Santa and sneak down the chimney, not to deliver gifts, but to steal them, and the trees and stockings too, tugging his little dog Max along in reindeer antlers. But when Christmas morning comes anyway, the Grinch has, let's say, a change of heart.

NAUGHTY OR NICE: Well, isn't that the point of the film? Is the Grinch actually a naughty holiday-thief, or is he deep down under that green fur a sweetheart? OK, it's Dr. Seuss. Now, what rhymes with "nice"...?

WHY IT GETS US IN THE SPIRIT: It's such a kiddie classic for all generations; it's almost sure to remind you of how magical Christmas seemed when you were in Grade 2.

MAGIC MOMENT: Could it be anything but bellow of "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" as the Grinch nabs every candy cane and ornament in Whoville? No, it could not.

SANTA SIGHTING: Well, wide-eyed Cindy Lou Who's sighting of Santa, who is actually the rotten Christmas crook in disguise. He tells her an evil lie and sends her to bed. You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch.

ACCOMPANYING CAROL: I've named it twice already.

PERFECT PRESENT FOR: The sweetest little Cindy Lou Who you know.

Freaky Fortnight!: Monster House

Photo: amazon.com

MONSTER HOUSE (2006)

THE GIST: DJ (Mitchel Musso) lives across the street from old Mr. Nebbercracker (Steve Buscemi), the terrifying, wretched man who howls at anyone on his lawn and destroys little children's toys. One day, DJ's buddy Chowder's (Sam Lerner) new basketball bounces onto Nebbercracker's lawn and DJ goes to get it. Nebbercracker, with his eye on his yard at all times, comes out of his house and yells at DJ with furor. It's too much for old man and he works himself up so much that he's wheeled away by an ambulance. But even with Nebbercracker gone, the house seems to be terrorizing on its own, swallowing people, animals and toys whole. And of course, none of it happens when the 'rents are around.

TRICK OR TREAT?: It's a trick for the little ones who are always bugging parents to watch something scary, but a treat for those of us over the age of six.

WHY IT GETS US IN THE SPIRIT: DJ and Chowder are at that age where they're wondering if they're too old to go trick-or-treating and it reminds us of how much fun Halloween used to be. I mean, don't you wish you could still dress up and collect free candy all night?

SCENE TO DIE FOR: Any scene with Officer Lester (Nick Cannon). I'm not actually a Nick Cannon fan but Officer Lester's expressions and idiocy are just hilarious.

BEST COSTUME: So it's not exactly a costume, but DJ's babysitter Zee's (Maggie Gyllenhaal) disguise as a goody two-shoes who sings along to Olivia Newton-John songs in the car is just great when we find out that she's actually a rebel who listens to metal.

SUGGESTED SWEET: Gummy bears. Just like trick-or-treating, you feel a little too old to be eating them.

Freaky Fortnight!: The Nightmare Before Christmas

Photo: amazon.ca

THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS (1993)

THE GIST: Somewhere, there is a forest where trees are doorways to towns where holidays reside. Jack Skellington (Chris Sarandon) is the king of Halloween Town where it's always Halloween. (Mind you, he's not the mayor; that's a plump, little bi-polar man.) One gloomy day, Jack goes off wondering with his ghost dog Zero in search of inspiration for the upcoming Halloween when he comes to the forest with the holiday portals. Curious about the door the shaped like a pine tree, he peeks inside and stumbles in, landing in Christmas Town. Enchanted, but bewildered, he has a eureka moment: Halloween Town should run Christmas this year! Thus follows the most bizarre, Halloween-infused Christmas ever.

TRICK OR TREAT?: Trick-ridden treat. Although it's a family film, any peek into Tim Burton's mind is always a little dark and eerie.

WHY IT GETS US IN THE SPIRIT: For those who love Halloween, who wouldn't want to visit a Halloween town? It's so grimy and slimey and crawly, just as Halloween should be, but it also takes a spin on the tradition in strange mix of family wholesomeness and almost-disturbing gloominess.

SCENE TO DIE FOR: The opening scene of "This is Halloween" where we meet the clown with the tear away face, the man under the stairs, the shadow on the moon at night and all the ghouls of Halloween town in the array of voices and odd garb. Not to mention, it marks the start to the amazing soundtrack by Danny Elfman.

BEST COSTUMES: Lock, Shock, and Barrel. Not because they might be the only costumes in the film (unless you count Jack in the body of a snowman) but because their marks are just slightly creepier versions of their actual faces.

SUGGESTED SWEET: Candy canes. (I mean, right?)

Don't You Forget About: FernGully: The Last Rainforest

Sure, it's fun to catch the latest flick at the multiplex, or grab the newest release at a video store, but sometimes you just gotta say, "Out with the new, and in with the unknown." There are plenty of older flicks out there that are worth a rental, but never registered on your radar. In Don't You Forget About, we remember the long-gone gems, so you don't have to.

Photo: source unknown

Remember that movie about the natives who lived in sacred trees whose lives were interrupted by a human intruder, working with a team to destroy their home forest for their own financial benefit? I mean, 17 years before Avatar hit the box office. This was even before Pocahontas showed us how to paint with all the colours of the wind. In 1992, FernGully: The Last Rainforest beat both these films to deliver its enviro-message.

This was exactly what made this film so ahead of its time. We all heard the dissenters following Al Gore's pleas in An Inconvenient Truth. More than a decade earlier, you can imagine how much tougher it was to get the message across. But speaking to little children with hungry minds to feed was a clever approach, especially when most children's films at the time were about princesses. Ok, so this film didn't steer clear from of romance either, at least this relationship was somewhat bi-racial. Y'know, fairy-human love.

In the last existing rain forest in the world lives a community of fairies, who believe that humans have become extinct. Of course, they aren't. And they're about to deforest the fairy world. But when fairy Crysta (Samantha Mathis) test her magic out on human Zak (Jonathan Ward) and shrinks him down to fairy size, there's a glimmer of hope (there kind of needs to be in a kids' movie).

What helps making this film enchanting is its use of light and colour, creating interesting shadows and beams, much like Avatar, but far less advanced. Fairies flicker through the forest with glowing blue and green trails, the sun shoots through branches and leaves and the forest is vibrant with flowers.

There's also darkness in a purely evil, slithery force. Years ago, elder Magi Lune (Grace Zabriskie) trapped Hexxus (Tim Curry) in a tree but when deforesters slice the tree down, his gooey, dark being is brought back to life. And as a dark, billowing creature with hollow white eyes, he's almost as frightening as The Nightmare Before Christmas' Oogie Boogie. Curry's rich voice is the perfect compliment.

Curry's big name isn't the only one selling the film either. Christian Slater, Robin Williams, Cheech Marin, Tommy Chong and Tone Loc all also lend their voices. And a few of them sing too.

The soundtrack is a mix of very bland and very interesting, absolutely nothing in between. One of the high points of the film is William's rap as Batty the bat. Ok, it sounds really awkward but it's actually kind of funny and you'll wish it lasted longer. Wilson Pickett's Land of 1000 Dances is also a great touch to the film. You'll probably find yourself singing it days later.

You also probably won't be able to help yourself from making totally legitimate Avatar comparisons. To get you started: theme, lighting, plot. While they're both aimed at very different audiences, the common threads are undeniable. And with Avatar's colossal success, there's even more reason to re-watch FernGully.

With a wide range of appeal and relevance to this day, it's a film for parents, children and children at heart. It's also a reminder that not all children's films have to be subliminally sexualized.

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